In order to understand the world
today Baseball why sandals + socks = beard how
Windows95 works why its 2000 Flushes and not 1999 or 2001
flushes you need to realize that everything is controlled by a
conspiracy coven bunch of
people gaggle herd made up of
the Illuminati man. united
fans Bankers Bankers who are man. united fans Bankers who
belong to the Illuminati man. united fans who bank Illuminati
members who marry bankers Banks located near grocery
stores Illuminati members with VISA cards Damian
Cooper with help from Pointy-Headed Intellectuals Tim Nolan Pointy-Headed
man. united fans Pointy-Headed Secular Humanists Gay
Intellectuals who have Pointy Heads people wearing
glasses God .
The conspiracy first started in
ancient times way back when when Spurs did the
double back when men were men and sheep were nervous July 12,
1546 at 3:23:20 PM in Europe, during the Crusades America, during the Civil
War A time when portishead was interesting Rome under the reign
of Emperor Spatula Athens, during Synchronized Swimming in the first
Olympics a drinking party after the end of school . They
have been responsible for many evensts throughout history, including The French Revolution The Russian
Revolution The Disco Revolution making toast always fall butter
side down The invention of the zipper the birth of Damian
cooper Arsenal Wanting #20 million for Anelka .
Today, members of the conspiracy are everywhere. They can be identified by
secret handshakes the way
they watch too much Star Trek T-Shirts saying "I'm with the
Conspiracy" because they sing "Stand up if you are with the
conspiricy" watching QVC Channel 24 hours straight behaving like
you were in a Burger King commercial tattoos of Elvis on their
butts wearing man. United shirts the way they never put the
toilet seat down .
They want to kill maim put the big hurt on give a chinese
burn to cause frostbite force to attend Bristol City
games all God-Fearing
Christians Your Mum Bristol Rovers Fans Damian
Copper Damian Coopers friends The Mighty Morphin Power
Rangers Savage Garden Fans and imprison resisters in
secret concentration
camps Portishead on UFOs in the Bermuda
Triangle using black
helicopters brightly-painted neon organge helicopters grey
Skodas super-enhanced golf carts black surplus Alton Towers
monorail cars 3-wheel cars .
In order to prepare for this, we all must stockpile nuclear weapons corner the market on
Super-Soakers buy SPAM by the gross blow up as many large
buildings as possible send death threats to Bristol city F.C. watch re-runs of The magic roundabout
play paintball all day . Since the media is controlled by
Tony Blair Damian
Cooper secular humanists Ed the Duck we should
get our information from me Top
Gear magazine Playboy Assault Rifles Illustrated the
secret messages only I can hear